Stop living in yesterday and tomorrow
You can be so busy thinking about yesterday and tomorrow that today might not get a look in. You might be having dinner but thinking about something that happened last week. Going for a walk while worrying about tomorrow. Sitting with someone you love while part of your mind is somewhere else completely.
We all do it. Our minds go backwards and forwards, and sometimes that’s useful, especially when we need to think things through or make plans. But if we spend too much time there, we can miss what’s happening right in front of us.
There’s some interesting research around this. In a Harvard study, people were asked what they were doing, what they were thinking about, and how happy they felt at different points during the day. Their minds wandered away from what they were doing surprisingly often, and when this happened they tended to feel less happy.
And that makes sense. Think about the times when you are fully in the moment. You’re walking somewhere beautiful and actually noticing it. You stop and look at a sunset instead of just glancing at it. Someone you love gives you a hug and, for a few seconds, you’re not thinking about what happened yesterday or what might happen tomorrow. You’re just there, taking it all in.
Being present doesn’t mean never thinking about the past or future. It just means noticing when your mind has wandered off into something you can’t change or something that hasn’t happened yet (and maybe never will), and then bringing your attention back.
A quick way to do that is through your senses. Look around and notice five things you can see. Actually look at them properly rather than just naming them quickly. Then notice four things you can touch or physically feel. Maybe your clothes against your skin, the chair underneath you, the warmth of a mug, or the air on your face. Then notice three things you can hear. Try to pick up on the quieter sounds you’d normally ignore.
It'll take less than a couple of minutes, but it can be enough to bring you back into the present.
